Ten Lessons from a Day at the Beach

1. Assuming the camera is where you *thought* you last saw it in the car is a big mistake. Always double check before you leave that you actually have the camera and can take photos of your sticky, sandy kids and don't have to rely on a measly blog post to preserve the memories!

2. Shaving your legs an hour before you spray on sun protection and get into salt water is a BAD idea - of gargantuan proportions.

3. While taking meticulous care to spray on sun protection all over your arms and legs, and asking your spouse to ensure that your back is adequately covered - it is always good to remember that your neck and the top of your chest area could also benefit from said spray. Otherwise you may spend the rest of the day cursing and dousing yourself in aloe.

4. Maybe you need to go to the beach more often so that your three year old kid can correctly identify the dusty, granular substance on her hands and doesn't have to tell you 'Mommy, my hands are covered in sea dirt'.

5. Don't assume that your normally quiet younger child is the shy timid type. Revel in his willingness to be knocked over by waves, laugh and pick himself up and brace himself for the next round. Enjoy his socializing with neighbouring beach goers, and his loud enthusiastic 'BYE's to them as they leave.

6. A navy one piece bathing costume is totally unflattering - time to buy a new one Annie (preferably one that you didn't last wear when you were six months pregnant!).

7. If you're squeamish about swimming in seaweed littered ocean - don't stand like an eejit trying to throw eleventy billion little pieces of it back towards the shore (only for the retracting waves to pull it right back at you), or certain Irish ladies standing at the water's edge with her kids might just split her sides laughing at you.

8. Don't expect that there are working toilets in the beach bathrooms, or that there will be a clean square inch of floor on which to stand and change out of your wet, sandy bathing costume. Although contorting yourself in all manner of positions to do so, while holding on to your clothes and towel - without bare feet or garments touching this floor could earn you a spot on the US Olympic Gymnastics team.

9. One plastic trash bag is never enough when you have two adults, two kids, diapers, wipes, and lunch leftovers.

10. Count down the minutes until next week when you plan to do this all over again. (Packing the camera, now!)

They're only markers!

Dear Kate Gosselin,

I realize that you have eight beautiful children and can imagine the amount of work a family of this size generates, I really can.

I understand that a family of ten will generate mountains of laundry to rival the Rockies, I get that.

However, markers? You wouldn't let your kids use markers in the Crayola Factory (where I'd be willing to bet they use the washable markers especially for little visitors)?

Come ON!

My heart was breaking watching an episode of Jon and Kate plus 8 last night. Kids in the Crayola Factory - what could be more dream worthy than that? Excited to use the many different art supplies available and actually have FUN, these kids were jumping out of themselves and pumped to get to use markers when Jon let them do it. You didn't like this though and immediately put an end to it, citing interminable laundry and not wanting kids to be seen with marker on their clothes. The kids, especially Cara and Maddy were devastated.

Washable markers are magic, they come right out in the wash - even without pre-treating the stains. If this doesn't work, Crayola.com have wonderful and plentiful tips on removing stains from their products, should you encounter these. And if all this fails, and your kids went home after having a great day at the Crayola Factory with a few marker marks on their clothes, in the scheme of things, is this the worst thing that could happen?

If you're going to take your kids on a fun day out - let them do that! Have fun.

Oh, and never underestimate the calming, relaxing effect of colouring with crayons or markers yourself. Sit down at the table with your kids - get those colouring books out - heck be reckless, breakout the dreaded MARKERS, and try it yourself. Enjoy the therapeutic benefits of doing nothing but shading in your images. Look at the delight on your children's faces when they have you all to themselves, colouring with them. I promise, you won't regret it.

Yours sincerely,

Blooming Marvelous.